Thursday, November 17, 2011

Ramblings of my Unfocused Mind

It's been a hard week. As a matter of a fact, it's been a hard month! I'm constantly fighting with myself. Two weeks ago, although I was having a tough time, I was focusing on God. And after that? Well, needless to say, I haven't been too focused. "Am I living where I'm supposed to live?" "Will I be capable of providing for myself in the future?" "Will I be able to keep the relationships I have now?" "What am I really passionate about?" I'm juggling so many worries at once and all I want to do is drop the balls and curl up in fetal position and hope that everything will work out all by itself. 

Instead of dropping the balls, I should maybe toss them to God because I'm not getting anywhere with these worries. One step at a time.... there's no need to rush. It's like learning to fly or ... (Okay, that last part was from a song. Do you ever just break out in singing? Or am I just weird?) Anyways, yes, toss the balls to Jesus because these worries are just too much for me! As you can maybe tell, I've been a little distracted lately. 

 25 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 26Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?" -Matthew 25-27 

While I sit here once again, in my favorite coffee shop, my mind is going every direction. So, if you're not catching what i'm throwing, then please just take note of the scripture. But, if you feel like continuing reading my rambling mind, then proceed to the next paragraph. 

One thing I do know, I'm a threat to Satan. He sees me making progress, so he attacks. So, I've been doing this awesome thing over the past month where I really picture Jesus' face in my mind every time I feel myself worrying. It came in handy a few days ago when I had a huge break down. I encourage you to try it. Do you remember in Sunday schools how they taught us WWJD (what would Jesus do)? Do you really ever take that into consideration? It's a very powerful thing. Learning to seek him out in every decision is life changing. I haven't gotten very good at it yet. 

Well, like I said, I'm extremely unfocused, so I'm going to end this right.... here


Darcie said...

its so tough being so distracted, i understand! but i love you. your blog is great. and you will get through it..

Anonymous said...

I love reading your blogs. It is like a little doorway to your heart, where I can stick my head in and peek inside. Your analogy of juggling the balls is wonderful. I feel like I've been juggling bricks lately, and they keep getting heavier, but I think I've tossed some to Jesus just today. It is amazing what a little prayer walk down a leafy path can do.
I love thinking about what Jesus would do in the very situation I find myself in. The mental image really helps me too. Good stuff Rach, it is very encouraging. <3

-Jordan (someday I will start a blog so I don't have to post anonymously)

Dawnee said...

Oh man, distractions!!! But, we're so much alike in that scatterbrained kind of way that you are quite easy to follow when you are distracted. I'm so proud of you. I'm proud of the amazing desire in your heart to serve God in ALL THINGS! and that you work so hard to do that.

I love Matthew 6:25-27. Perfect scripture to have here. Also...

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11

Oh how I fall back on that one so much of the time!

Your analogy of dropping the balls or tossing them to Jesus.... EXCELLENT!!!!! He's a GREAT catcher. Even better than Jason Varitek of the Boston Red Sox. I know, hard to believe, but SO true. I'm sure even Jason would agree to this.

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